I would never have thought that there would be so many special events happening over Easter – mostly because it was never really that much of a big deal in our house. Sure we would get a couple of crappy eggs – but my mum would secretly open them, steal the chocolate inside and just leave us with the egg and it’s terrible sub-par chocolate. It never came close to Christmas. But nowadays, it’s pretty massive. I’ve even heard of people getting presents and money for it which is mental. Anyway, I was wrong – there’s loads of stuff going on – so here’s a roundup. Enjoy.
Gold Teeth @ Odd Bar
As a big fan of the Spice Girls, All Saints and Aqua, I don’t think that Gold Teeth caters for my tastes. However – if your music taste is more eclectic, then head on down to Odd Bar on Easter Sunday for a FREE night of Hip-Hop, Rap, R&B and Garage with legendary disc-put-in-drawer-er DJ Yung Jozy. It’s the first time it’s been held at Odd so it should be a special one.
Easter Sunday 16th April 2017, 8pm til very late, Free Entry
As well as Gold Teeth, Odd will also be hosting a massive all-dayer on Easter Monday – Bang the Drum Live: The Big Bang. Even with a silly name; you can still expect loads of alternative bands (for free!) including And The Hangnail, Baby Tooth, Ronald Raygun plus many more. If any of those names mean anything to you – get yourself down from 3pm.
Easter Monday 17th April, 3pm – 11pm, Free entry
Odd Bar, 30-32 Thomas Street, Northern Quarter, Manchester M4 1ER
www.oddbar.co.uk
The Quays Duck Race 2017
Now in its 4th year, the Quays Duck Race gives you the chance to buy a duck (£2 with free chocolate egg) and let it race against thousands of others through the Quays. I’m presuming it will be more of an obstacle course – with your duck having to dodge old shopping trolleys and severed legs. There will also be a Mega Duck Race too, where businesses buy a huge duck to try to get you to buy more of their products, as well as stalls, games and entertainment for the whole family. Unless you’re the Addams Family – in which case you’re not invited.
Good Friday 14th April 2017, 12pm – 4pm
Helly Hansen Watersports Centre, M50 3SQ
www.medequip4kids.org.uk/events/quays-duck-race-2017
Scene Indian Street Kitchen
During the duck race on Good Friday, you might as well head on down the canal to Scene Indian Street Kitchen for some lovely Indian food at their annual outdoor BBQ. From midday their chefs will be cooking their fantastic Samosa Chaat, Lamb Chops and even the brilliant Samosa burger – all hopefully in the sunshine. Although to be fair – the outdoor area is heated too so if it’s rainy and cold – they’ve got you covered. Literally.
On Easter Monday Scene will also be celebrating their 2nd Birthday, and like all 2 year-olds – they want to make a big bloody fuss. So they will be offering 50% off their special birthday menu if you book online and eat after 4pm. Just quote ‘birthday50‘ when booking and you’re sorted.
Scene Indian Street Kitchen, 4 A Leftbank, Spinningfields, Manchester, M3 3AN
www.scenedining.com
Rosylee
Hopefully the sun will be shining over the Easter Bank Holiday, and although the weather forecast is about as accurate as a horoscope, it would be nice to see Michael Fish getting it right for once and predicting sunshine. If so, head on down to Stevenson Square where you’ll find some great places to sit outside and pretend you’re in Barcelona for a few hours. Rosylee have a gin truck turning up, provided by Thomas Dakin Gin; offering delicious Gin and Tonics as well as plenty of free samples.
They have a truck-load of other stuff going on too, including 2 for £10 cocktails, roast dinners on Easter Sunday and Afternoon Tea all weekend. Best of all though is a brilliant 50% off food on Easter Monday. After the amount of money you’re going to spend – this might be the best bet. Booking is advised.
Rosylee, 11 Stevenson Square, Manchester M1 1DB
www.rosylee.com
When In Manchester Festival
If you’re a fan of bands who spend more money on Elnett than they do on toothpaste then you’re in for a treat on Saturday 15th, with the When In Festival taking over pretty much every Indie place on Oldham Road and belting out some great live music for you to bounce slightly on the spot to. The Castle, Gullivers, Night and Day and Jimmy’s NQ will host Jordan Allen, The Tuts, Kashmere and Trash as well as loads more throughout the day. So get your skinny jeans, drag your Chucks under a truck for 10 minutes and get yourself down there.
Saturday 15th April 2017, 2:30pm til 11:00pm
Tickets from £14
National Museum of Football
Here’s another option for you if you’re lumbered with children over the Easter weekend. Perhaps they are yours, or perhaps they are visiting – it doesn’t matter. They’re not going anywhere until you make them sick on chocolate – giving you enough time to slip a few vodkas down your neck. The National Football Museum will attempt to help you out with their own Easter Trail quiz, which hopes to keep the kids interacting by setting investigative tasks and quizzes to encourage learning and engagement. All sounds brilliant – and it’s free. Oh, and their fantastic Arcade Club is back too – which is one of the best things in Manchester. Ever.
Good Friday – Easter Monday, 10am – 5pm
Urbis Building, Cathedral Gardens, Todd St, City Centre, Manchester M4 3BG
www.nationalfootballmuseum.com
Black Dog Ballroom and Dog Bowl
Walk into any supermarket over Easter and you will find loads of screaming kids, a bucket load of cheap booze and thousands of hot cross buns slipping off the production line straight into the mouths of awaiting working class families. Jumping on the bandwagon are Black Dog Ballroom (and Dog Bowl) who have created a rather genius hot cross bun burger with a mini candied carrot garnish on the side. To be fair, when I heard about this burger about 2 minutes ago I immediately wanted it – so head on down from the 10th til the 17th April and get your chops wrapped around it.
Black Dog Ballroom, Nq, Basement Affleck’s Palace, Corner Tib Street / Church Street, Manchester, M4 1PW
Black Dog Ballroom NWS, 11 – 13 New Wakefield St, Manchester, M1 5NP
Dog Bowl, Whitworth St West, Manchester, M1 5WW
UnderDog
On top of this are a few mental parties at the UnderDog including Lotto Boyz Live on Saturday and an Old Skool Soul & Reggae Throwback on Sunday. Although it seems that none of these people can spell, they can probably spin some discs whilst holding a headphone to their ears. They’ll probably sell out, so get your tickets fast-ish.
Lotto Boyz tickets: https://www.skiddle.com/whats-on/Manchester/Underdog/Mista-Litty-Presents-LOTTO-BOYZ-LIVE/12947046/
Old Skool Soul & Reggae tickets: https://blackdogballroom.co.uk/nws/2017/03/23/ost-presents-soul-reggae-bank-holiday-16th-april/
Underdog (underneath Black Dog Ballroom NWS), 11 – 13 New Wakefield St, Manchester, M1 5NP
www.blackdogballroom.co.uk/nws/underdog
Menagerie
If you’re unlucky enough to have normal parents, who can’t afford to buy you a new £200 hat, a business class flight to LA and tickets to Coachella, then you will have to make do with the next best thing over at Menagerie. They will be launching their Coachella inspired S/S//2017 parties on Easter Sunday from 2pm. Tickets are £15 or you can get a Set Menu dining ticket for £35. I’m not entirely sure what to expect, but judging from rich people’s Coachella inspired Instagram accounts; you can expect plenty of top music, cocktails and loads of plastic daisy chain headbands from Primark. 2 for a tenner.
Sunday 16th April, from 2pm
Menagerie, One New Bailey, New Bailey St, Salford M3 5JL
www.menagerierestaurant.co.uk
Cadbury’s Egg Hunts
If you can forgive them for selling out to Kraft foods and slowly changing all the ingredients of Dairy Milk so it resembles the kind of chocolate you would find underneath a tramps armpit, then head on down to a National Trust Park over the Easter weekend for an Easter Egg Hunt. There’s plenty of challenges and manky chocolate to be found, which I’m sure kids will absolutely love. It’s held Friday to Monday at Dunham Massey, Lyme Park and Quarry Bank. Check their website for more details.
Charlotte Church’s Late Night Pop Dungeon @ Gorilla
Charlotte Church is on this list because I used to fancy her. Obviously not when she was the Voice of an Angel Charlotte Church. I mean the newly loaded, I’m going to swear and get pissed up in Cardiff Tiger Tiger on a Saturday Charlotte Church. She was great. Hopefully she reads this and gets in touch. Although I doubt it – nobody reads these things. I could say anything. Tits. Anyhow, Gorilla will host Charlotte’s Late Night Pop Dungeon on Thursday 13th April and with just those 4 words – it already sounds brilliant. She’ll be playing some old, obscure pop hits from the 90s and 00s so put some comfy shoes on.
Tickets are £15.40
Thursday 13th April, 6.30pm – 10pm
Gorilla, 54-56 Whitworth St W, Manchester M1 5WW
www.thisisgorilla.com
Peek A Groove Collective Easter Jamboree & BBQ @ The Font, Chorlton
It’s Easter Sunday and The Font over in Chorlton are putting on a belting party for anyone who enjoys fresh air, hot meat and vinyl. Although you’ll be disappointed to know they aren’t putting on a PVC Dogging Party feat. Steve McFadden, you may be pleased to know that they have an Easter Jamboree and BBQ. If you can pull them away from trying to set fire to Tesco, those Chorlton lot can look forward to a day of guest beers, BBQ’ed grub and a 13 hour vinyl session featuring 18 DJs and their black plastic scratchy discs.
The Font, 115-117 Manchester Rd, Chorlton, M21 9PG Manchester
www.thefontbar.wordpress.com/chorlton
Howling Rhythm @ Ruby Lounge
Its Howling Rhythm time at Ruby Lounge again. There are three things you can expect: 1. Bloody brilliant 60s and 70s soul and funk tunes from the likes of Jackie Wilson, Marvin Gaye and The Supremes. 2. Loads of dancing and slipping on the floor. 3. Seeing me pissed up off my face on the dancefloor, most likely with some viscous liquid in and around my mouth.
Saturday 15th April 2017, 11pm – 4am
Ruby Lounge, 28-34 High St, Manchester M4 1QB
www.howlingrhythm.com
Tusk Heaton Moor
Anyone chilling in Heaton Moor over the Easter weekend can pop into Tusk and enjoy some excellent promotions to keep them going. As well as a slap up Easter Sunday Roast dinner on offer, there’s also a belting Happy Hour and a free Easter Egg for all children under 12 who eat on Easter Sunday (just book for Sunday before Good Friday). That’s brilliant if you’re a kid under 12 – free chocolate is pretty much the greatest aspiration you can imagine at that age. Whereas if you’re not under 12 – you’re guaranteed a horde of kids running around off their tits on sugar and e-numbers. So if you hate kids, perhaps give it a miss.
Easter Sunday from 12pm
Tusk, 110 Heaton Moor Rd, Stockport SK4 4NZ
www.tuskmanchester.com/heaton-moor
Hotel Gotham
I’m going to sit here and believe that Gotham Hotel is so named because Batman is the General Manager. If he isn’t I’ll be angry. And you won’t like me when I’m angry. Oops..wrong superhero. Anyway, I’m sure that Bruce Wayne himself would not scoff at this stunning hotel, and would probably find himself fannying around with supermodels in the two AA Rosette-awarded hotel restaurant – Honey. For Easter they are introducing Afternoon Tea; priced at £25 per person. You can expect homemade cakes, treats and lashings of clotted cream in one of the best buildings in Manchester. There’s limited availability even now, so get booking away.
Hotel Gotham, 100 King St, Manchester M2
www.hotelgotham.co.uk
B.I.G Easter Hip-Hop Party and Bottomless Lunch @ Pen and Pencil
The Pen and Pencil in the NQ has a list of events so long that you’d probably need a couple of pens, a few highlighters and one of them big jotter books with squares on the pages that you used to get at school. The highlight I would say is their B.I.G Easter Hip Hop Party and Bottomless Lunch on Easter Sunday. For £35 you can get a Bottomless Lunch with unlimited food and drink, have a little rest, unbuckle your belt and then from 7pm they’ll be kicking it up a notch with a massive hip-hop party from Disc Jockey Gareth Brooks. Like most of these things nowadays – booking is advised.
Sunday 16th April – 2pm- 5pm and 7pm – 1am
Fourways House, 57 Hilton St, Manchester M1 2EJ
www.thepenandpencilnq.co.uk
Infamous Diner
Once again Infamous Diner are going all out for a special calendar event – with enough offers and happy hours over the Easter weekend to keep you drunk enough and full enough to put up with those visiting relatives who are a massive pain in the arse. Happy hours from 5pm include 2 for £10 cocktails, 2 Sol for a fiver and a bottle of wine for a tenner. These offers are also on all day Easter Monday – as well as a 3 stack of pancakes with a drink for £5. On Easter Sunday if you book a table after 5pm you can enjoy 50% off as well as a free Easter Egg for any child under 12. Phew – there’s plenty there isn’t there. They do have a selection of Easter Special Pancakes too but I’ll just paraphrase for you: Diabetes and batter.
Infamous Diner, Basil Chambers, 3-5 Basil Chambers Nicholas Croft, Manchester M4 1EY
www.infamousdiner.co.uk
Kid Ink @ Manchester Academy
I’ve been told by my hip-hop loving mate to add Kid Ink at the Manchester Academy to this line up. After a quick Google I can tell you that he’s a big hip-hop geezer from LA who has brown hair and tattoos. If you’re into his music then you’re going to know much more than I am – so what’s the point? If you don’t know anything about him, get on Spotify and listen to it you idiot. If you like it buy a ticket. If not, stay in and watch re-runs of Bullseye on Challenge.
Saturday 15th April 2017, Doors at 7pm
Tickets £25.00 advance
Manchester Academy, Moss Ln E, Moss Side, Manchester M14 4PX
www.manchesteracademy.net
The Lowry Hotel
If you are the kind of person who likes the finer things in life, then you are correct in reading Manchester’s Finest, and you can’t get any finer than the 5 star Lowry Hotel. Unfortunately I’ve never stayed there myself, its unlikely they would let a scruffy savage like myself even in through the front doors, but if you are here over the Easter weekend then you are in for a treat. The hotel will be offering a special Easter Sunday Menu on the 16th for £50 per person as well as an Afternoon Tea for £39 for 2 (including a glass of prosecco each). So indulge yourself in some lovely tea, finger sandwiches, scones, pastries and clotted cream – with the added benefit of Easter Egg painting for kids so you can get a bit of peace and quiet. Lovely stuff.
The Lowry Hotel, 50 Dearmans Pl, Chapel Wharf, Salford, Manchester M3 5LH
www.thelowryhotel.com
Grafene
Head on down to modern British restaurant Grafene and treat yourself to some fit food this Easter. They will be offering a special of 2 courses for £19 or 3 courses for £24 all day on Easter Sunday which is very nice of them. On top of this, they will also be giving away some specially prepared chocolate egg delights to celebrate the Easter period. Apparently these treats are being made by their on-site pastry chef – probably sick and tired of rubbing butter into flour all day. Or making pies and not being able to eat them.
Grafene, 55 King St, Manchester M2 4LQ
www.grafene.co.uk
Refuge Basement
The basement over at Refuge will be hosting two mental parties on Good Friday and Saturday 15th April which will be sure to appeal to anyone who loves a groove. First up on Good Friday is ‘So Flute’; a night which emerged 5 years ago and offers ‘a melting-pot of worldwide music that focuses on a strong, soulful undercurrent’. Whatever that means, you can expect a top night with some pretty special tunes.
Next up is ‘A Love From Outer Space’ which again sounds like a personal ad written by a thesaurus. I’m not entirely sure what kind of music to expect from ALFOS – mostly because I’m an ignoramus when it comes to actual proper new music, but DJ’s Andrew Weatherall and Sean Johnston are sure to know what they’re doing. The night is already popular enough without me sticking my nose in and getting everything wrong.
Tickets are available from – https://www.skiddle.com/whats-on/Manchester/The-Refuge/
Refuge, Oxford Street, Manchester M60 7HA
www.refugemcr.co.uk
Spa Satori
As part of their Easter celebrations, Spa Satori in the NQ are offering a body wrap treatment plus a 30 minute elemis facial for only £85 over the Easter weekend. As someone who abhors physical contact I needed to do a bit of research to work out what these things even are. Apparently Spa Satori have teamed up with local Eastern Block Records to use their Fairtrade coffee grounds to make their body scrubs and treatments. In addition to this, they have created a Fairtrade chocolate, coconut and orange wrap using raw cacao powder which you use to wrap around your body instead of stuffing it down your neck which would be my first impulse. While you are wrapped up in chocolate, like Willy Wonka in an industrial accident, you will receive a soothing head massage, finishing off with a facial that leaves your whole body feeling hydrated and super nourished. If you want to treat yourself, or someone else for that matter, head on down.
Spa Satori, 112 High St, Manchester M4 1HQ
www.spasatori.co.uk
Neighbourhood
It’s Easter Sunday. You found yourself up til 4am dancing and getting sloshed on some manky wine that your friend brought round from their holiday to Tunisia. You are rougher than a brickie’s fingertips. What’s the best thing to do? Get back on it down at Neighbourhood with their Easter Sunday Bottomless Brunch. Grab some lovely grub and bottomless Bloody Mary’s, cocktails or Prosecco and sort your bloody head out. Featuring live music and a DJ, the party will continue right into the night – so there’s no need to move anywhere. Which is probably good because you’d probably fall over you pissed up idiot.
Neighbourhood, The Avenue North, Spinningfields, Manchester M3 3BT
www.neighbourhoodrestaurant.co.uk
Frog and Bucket
There’s a packed weekend over at the Frog and Bucket so even the most sour-faced miserable person will find something to giggle at. Personal pick of the bunch has to be Easter Sunday’s Improv from the Discount Comedy Checkout – who will take your suggestions and seamlessly incorporate them into their brilliant sketches and games. If you remember ‘Who’s Line is it Anyway?’ then this is perfect for you. On top of this, they are offering a special deal of tickets plus a meal for only £14 per person.
As well as Sunday’s Improv, you can also head on down on Good Friday or Saturday for their usual Barrel of Laughs, with 3 top international comics, or the legendary Beat the Frog on Easter Monday, which is always a right good laugh. As a little cherry on top, they will also be offering 25% off show and meal packages booked through their website using the discount code “Easter“. Nice.
Frog and Bucket, 102 Oldham St, Manchester M4 1LJ
www.frogandbucket.com
Cottonopolis
The Easter weekend at Cottonopolis looks to be a rather enjoyable experience for anyone wandering Newton Street looking for somewhere warm. There’s loads of music from the likes of Will Tramp, Paulette, Jamie Bull and You Dig – who will be supplying all your disco and house needs. On top of this, they will be offering their Brunch menu on Easter Sunday and Monday which includes their waffle selection which takes both sweet and savoury turns, the Wagyu Brisket and Poached Egg Crumpet! Actually, they sound pretty bloody fit.
Cottonopolis, 16 Newton Street, Manchester, M1 2AE
www.cottonopolis-nq.com
Bakerie
There will be a big new night starting on Easter Saturday over at Bakerie in the Northern Quarter – so if you’re a fan of disco, funk, house and classic tunes then you should get yourself down and give DJ Mark Hogg a listen. The night is called ‘Beats’, with the B a different colour than the ‘eats’ – because the place is called Bakerie and they usually do food which you eat. See what they did there!? Beats @ Bakerie is open from 9pm ‘til 2am every Saturday from then on.
Bakerie, 45 Lever Street, Northern Quarter, Manchester, M1 1FN
bakeriemcr.com
Zouk
The folk at Zouk will be offering a rather delectable selection of their unique Sunday Roasts over the Easter weekend which are an innovative change to the traditional roast. With a choice of spicy marinated leg of lamb or Balochi marinated whole chicken as well as lashes of veg and potatoes, and Zouk’s own special spicy gravy – you’ve got something a bit different to keep you sober over this auspicious Christian holiday.
Zouk, Unit 5, The Quadrangle, Chester St, Manchester M1 5QS
zoukteabar.co.uk
Revolution
Although they’re not everyone’s cup of tea, and the last time I was in the Parsonage Gardens one I ended up in a very civilised head-lock, Revolution bars do one thing really well – vodka. I think it’s safe to say that they have one of the best selections of mental, novelty flavours in the city and over Easter is no exception. They have specially made a Creme Egg vodka for you to try – which to be fair – sounds like it would be fit. I can’t eat a full Creme Egg myself, but I could definitely have a fair few shots of this. In addition to the vodders, they also have events spread over the Easter Weekend including a rather interesting chocolate egg hunt on Easter Saturday.
Revolution Deansgate Locks, Parsonage Gardens and Oxford Road
www.revolution-bars.co.uk/bars/manchester
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WeXutK-nrdA
Vintage Swing at The Printworks
If you accidently find yourself in the Printworks over Easter – try not to panic. First of all, don’t look anyone directly in the eyes. Secondly, have a scoot around at all of the various Easter events they are putting on and you might find yourself inadvertently having a good time. Perhaps. There is the return of their 14th annual Vintage Swing Festival which brings vintage cars, stalls, chocolate and plenty more other family-related things for you to do. There’s live performances from Blues musician Jackson Sloan, free Swing and Lindy-Hop dance lessons as well as face-painters and a special Easter Egg hunt. Oh and Hard Rock Cafe will have some poor sod dressed up in an Easter Bunny outfit, sweating their tits off and getting kicked in the shins by naughty little buggers.
The Printworks, 27 Withy Grove, Manchester M4 2BS
www.theprintworks.com